Why I Love the Westboro Baptist Church Part 1: RAGE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Before the hate mail comes flooding in some facts need to be made clear. I do not endorse the doctrines or practices of the Westboro Baptist Church. I find them to be unintentionally hilarious at best and horribly cruel and disgusting at worst. However, I do not hate the members of the church or see them as monsters regardless of their actions. This may shock some but my experience with WBC has made me a better person and follower of Christ. That sounded really out there didn't it. This series will be the narrative of my Westboro Baptist Church experience and how they've changed me for the better. It's going to be a long one so lets get started.

I discovered Westboro Baptist Church in late 2007 through of all things, my 10th grade World History class. My teacher, Mrs. Clark, was one of those crazy teachers everyone wishes they could have. We tended to get off topic a lot and I'm convinced we talked about college football more than history. One day Mrs. Clark told the class to search "The Most Hated Family in America" on Youtube. Being curious I checked it out. Boy was that a mistake. The first video I clicked on was a segment from the Jeremy Kyle Show. The video quickly shifted from goofy, to creepy, to the most rage inducing thing I've ever seen in my life. Unfortunately, I'm not the brightest bulb in the drawer and I kept watching instead of introducing my now cursed PC to my Dad's sledgehammer. It was here I was introduced to Shirley Phelps-Roper and her spawn Megan and Rebekah.  Looking back they actually reminded me a little of Cinderella's evil step family which is horrible yet FREAKING AWESOME at the same time seeing how I love my Disney villains.

Am I the only one who sees the resemblance here?

At the time however, I wanted to reach my hands into the internet and strangle them which would hopefully  retroactively erase them from existence. Shirley was just about the worst person ever, Megan was mommy's little pitbull and was just as terrible, and Rebekah..... well she actually seemed kinda pleasant minus the hate speech and all, but she had to be punished for her wrongdoing. Hopefully their punishment would involve getting punched in the face by Nicholas Cage in a bear suit. Man I love that guy.

Westboro Baptist Church deeply disturbed me. Most people would just write them of as crazies but I just couldn't let it go. How could a group of people turn a religion which I always thought was about loving your neighbor and making the world a better place and turn it into what might possibly be the most sinister and vile  belief system on the planet? The gay bashing I understood being from the south. Heck I was probably one of the only males I knew at the time who wasn't a raving homophobe. I just couldn't wrap my head around the idea that God hated almost everyone and he wanted his followers to picket people's funerals based on what I knew about Christianity.  You know what, I'm not even going to call WBC's deity God because it just doesn't feel right to me. Instead, he will be referred to as GIYGAS!!!!!!!!!!!! Please allow me to introduce you to the face of your night terrors for the rest of your life.

You cannot grasp the true form of Giygas's love and mercy.

But deep down there was an emotion I was feeling which I could not ignore, fear. Fear that maybe these people were right and God well at least from my perspective was the Ultimate Evil . WBC are certainly a charismatic bunch and they did have some biblical justification for some of their beliefs. Granted that doesn't mean the bible is being used properly but they found a way to defend themselves.  Due to anger and fear I became fascinated with Westboro  and did some further research. I eventually came across Louis Theroux's documentary, "The Most Hated Family in America," which was probably what Mrs. Clark really recommended to my class. This is a must see for anyone who is interested in WBC. Louis tried to explore the church on a human level and it was a very enlightening feature. A few things struck me. First, the teenage boy in me couldn't help but notice just how attractive many of the female members were. Too bad they were all much older than me and they worshiped The Universal Cosmic Destroyer. Hahaha...... I'm lonely inside. Seriously though, the women pictured bellow will play major roles in later parts of this series. Remember them.

From Left to Right

Top Row: Rebekah  Phelps-Roper, Libby  Phelps , Megan Phelps-Roper

Bottom Row: Jael Phelps, Louis "God Help Him" Theroux, Lauren Drain.

Great, my Mom's name's Libby. This is really embarrassing.  On a more positive note Jael really is a beautiful name. We need more of them in this world as long as they don't hold silly signs.

More importantly, The way they acted perplexed me. While the WBC members could be brutally mean spirited on the picket line but they could be some of the nicest people around in their everyday life. I really didn't know what to think after watching. I still thought these people were scum, but likeable scum I guess. Except Megan, I still couldn't stand her. Sorry but have just got the worse first impression of her ever from Jeremy Kyle.

Eventually, I just moved on. Westboro Baptist were just a cult of hateful and brainwashed tools who thrived off the pain of others. They weren't worth my time. I planed to do with WBC what I do with every Highlander movie/ tv show/anime/video game made after the original film and just pretend they don't exist. Then February 7, 2013 came along and lets just say sometimes your life gets a little bit more interesting than you usually like.